Maybe it was the Country Music...
I couldn't explain why I felt nervous about going to Longreach. After all, I am a seasoned world traveller - I've rocked along the Friendship Highway, I've trekked mountains in Nepal and I've travelled deep into the Arabian desert. So why did I inwardly quake at the thought of going on a 3-day outback road trip with friends? Maybe it was the country music. My friend who loves all things country invited me to go on a New Year's Eve gig tour with her musician boyfriend. So with a bottle of pink champagne carefully packed near a spray bottle full of water (in case my skin dried out) we set off for our first stop - Tambo. It wasn't long before the towns grew small, shabby and sun-bleached; the dirt turned from black and soft blanketed by green crops to rust red and tangerine. The highway drew us relentlessly onward for hour after hour. Tambo was a quaint little place and surprisingly green. It was a relief to stop and rest - the highway had been litterred with so many suicidal roos it was like a Skippy Road Massacre. The doors of the Cannungra Hotel were straight out of a Wild West movie and inspired me to practise my swagger a little as we trolled to the bar stools. My friend and I watched as our friend started up a conversation with the hoteliers with restrained impatience. We were introduced then politely left alone as if courtesy demands that newcomers be allowed to simply sit and absorb the local ambience. After an hour we opted to absorb in our rooms. We had never stayed at a pub before so our curiosity quickly turned to surprise and then exploded into hysterical giggles as we surveyed the facilities. The hotel had been constructed in the 1950's and apparently not much had changed since then. The bathroom was functional but far from pristine. We gasped at the long rusty stains in the sinks and bath where the bore water had deposited its leftovers. My friend had to leap out of the toilet when she flushed it because it suddenly transformed into a fountain, flooding the floor with water. The showers were a complicated affair - mine had nothing to cover the doorway. The floors were all painted blood red to avoid cleaning the bore water stains. In the dark interior of the shower cubicle I tried to stand away from the water while I turned it on and immediately bumpled into spider webs. Squealing and grumbling we turned the water on which issued at a perfect temperature and I gratefully stepped under. A cockroach ran out when my friend turned her water on and she yelped. The metallic smell was inescapable and I could tolerate until I figured out what it smelt of: blood. That dull aroma combined with the hot air, exhaustion and blood-red surrounds resulted in a feeling of lingering nauseousness. We sat down to dinner and my friend asked her boyfriend what time he would start playing. "I'm playing tomorrow night!" he responded. My friend gasped in horror, "What? I thought we were only spending one night in this hole!" He shook his head in total surprise at the look of horror over my friend's face. She began to laugh hysterically at the thought of staying one more day in Tambo - I joined in and soon we were in painful fits of laughter. While her boyfriend sat in stunned confusion we laughed, and laughed. It lasted for about ten minutes I think after which, we managed to restrain ourselves. It wasn't too bad at that point, but then, the country music hadn't started yet...
